HEAVEN IS A PLACE ON EARTH

Hallsvale, in Auckland to be precise.

February 2034

When 37 Ridgmount Drive, Hallsvale goes under the hammer at a sold out Eden Park on Saturday, it will become Aotearoa/NZ’s most valuable property. It will also set a new record as “The World’s Most Expensive Home” .

David and Tamara Wilson were newlyweds and first-time buyers when the Auckland bungalow last came on the market - back in FEBRUARY 2024. A cost of living crisis, and high Interest rates made it a risky purchase, but with their modest savings, and more than a little determination, the couple managed to buy it and clamber onto the very bottom rung of the property ladder. 

So how did this 3 bedroom, 1 bathroom “Doer-upper” go from not making reserve, to being the world’s most desirable address? The Top Rung so to say.

Well, it’s all down to TECHNOLOGY. Or lack of it.

Don’t be fooled by aerial on the roof, David and Tamara’s modest abode is the world’s last remaining Black Spot. “The Little House Where Time Stood Still”. No Wifi. No Mobile signal. No TV. No Fax or Landline. Nada. Nothing works between those four, borer-ridden walls. And no-one can work out why. (Elon Musk was recently convicted of trespassing, after trying to prove StarLink could work there). Local Service Providers have removed the address from their database.

This technological blackhole may seem like Nirvana in 2034, but 10 years ago when they bought the property, it was an absolute disaster. David felt they’d been scammed.

"Of course the agent knew. We’d spent our last cent buying the place, so there was no way we could afford a lawyer to take them to court."

David gives a little smirk when I suggest it may’ve worked out in their favour anyway.

"I won’t disagree, or claim we didn’t celebrate when the Realtors went under. AI is the best thing to have happened to the property market. No more blood-sucking agents."

Despite the massive windfall coming their way, the pair still seem upset at what happened. 

"The first couple of years were hard. Very hard," says Tamara. "I was pregnant with our first when we moved in, and David (who was an IT Professional at the time), could no longer work from home. The lack of communication options was problematic to say the very least. But now, we wouldn’t change it for the world."

For the last 3 years, the Wilson Home has been AIRBnB’s most searched for and highly rated property. "We’ve met the most amazing people renting out the spare room. We had the Dalai Lama stay recently. He said he’d never meditated so well."

The couple are still taking bookings - by Post, naturally. "Having mail to open in the morning puts a real spring in your step," Tamara tells me. "Our youngest Matilda, already has the most amazing stamp collection."

Auckland Council last week bestowed Heritage Status upon the property, meaning the new owner won’t be able to develop the site, but that seems to have only added to its desirability. For the last 2 weeks, prospective buyers from every corner of the world have been arriving in Auckland. There isn’t a hotel room to be found.

"I know! It’s crazy!," Tamara squeals. "It reminds me of when Taylor Swift was still touring. Before she settled down with that sports guy."

I ask them if they’ve set a reserve price for their Hallvale home.

"Are you kidding? How can you put a price on peace?," he replies. "Having been lucky enough to experience it ourselves, all we can say is this; If you have it, please, please make sure you share it. Peace unshared is just silence”.

The auction will be taking place Saturday at 1.30pm at a sold out Eden Park.